Deviant Login Shop  Join deviantART for FREE Take the Tour
About Varied / Hobbyist Member Rena Vaz (Laurena Vazquez)Female/United States Recent Activity
Deviant for 4 Years
Needs Premium Membership
Statistics 37 Deviations 1,011 Comments 8,063 Pageviews

Newest Deviations

''Look down at me and you see a fool; look up at me and you see a god; look straight at me and you see yourself.''

-Charles Manson <3

Favourites

deviantID

wench-under-ur-bed's Profile Picture
wench-under-ur-bed
Rena Vaz (Laurena Vazquez)
Artist | Hobbyist | Varied
United States
On December 16th, 2013, I lost my heart and soul, boyfriend and best friend to suicide.
The heartache is irrevocable...
Nov. 13. 1991
~
Dec. 16. 2013


But for some, there is still hope.
Please allow me to implore you to reach out to those who are hurting
You could just save their life.
Interests
Almost 4 weeks ago, on December 16th, I lost my truest love and boyfriend of 2 years, to suicide.

I have always considered myself a strong person but I find that belief, and many others, to be shaken as of late.

I have never been in loved so much, or loved so much, in all of my 20 years.

A shadow of despair and sorrow have set over where the sun used to set for me.
It feels as if a rotted lump of cancer has taken the place of a once beating heart, inside my chest.

Every single day is a struggle beyond strength and endurance, to move out of bed and find the will, or might to go on.

Life was a journey - a glorious, healing and growing journey, until he decided to end it all.
I doubt I will ever forgive him for this, and I know I will never forgive myself - All those times and nights he saved me, yet I couldn't save him. Grief and woe have replaced all other emotions felt.
The heartache is irrevocable......

And I know Andrew would want me to live, thrive and be all I dreamed to be, behind closed eyelids.
He would want me to live life for the both of us, find it in myself to forgive him and pick up the pieces.
But this isn't something you "heal" from. This isn't something you plan to cope with.

There is nothing more valuable or dear that could have been taken from me.
When he pulled the trigger, he took me with him.

In loving memory of Andrew Dalton Salsman.
Auf wiedersehen zu meine wahre liebe.
Te extrano y te quiero mucho.

Nov. 13. 1991
         ~
Dec. 16. 2013

AdCast - Ads from the Community

×

Groups

Comments


Add a Comment:
 
:iconelithiltail:
Elithiltail Featured By Owner Jun 27, 2014  Student General Artist
:iconsuperheroglompplz:
Reply
:iconyuki-photo:
Yuki-Photo Featured By Owner Jun 16, 2014
Thank you so much for the fav`s :heart:

Don't forget to follow me on Facebook (if you don't do that allready).
More pictures there Yuki-Photography
Reply
:iconguillomcool:
guillomcool Featured By Owner May 22, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Thanx for the Tigra fave, rena ! ;)
Reply
:iconspencey:
Spencey Featured By Owner May 21, 2014
Thanks for faving  Dinner for Two, Dr Fu Manmew? 
 :)
Reply
:iconmokutekiwa:
MokutekiWa Featured By Owner May 17, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Thanks for the fave! :heart:
Reply
:iconsilencedeathsquad:
SilenceDeathSquad Featured By Owner Apr 26, 2014  New member Hobbyist Traditional Artist
<3
Reply
:iconlethalkitten:
LethalKitten Featured By Owner Apr 20, 2014
Thanks for the fav 
Reply
:iconsniperplushie:
SniperPlushie Featured By Owner Jan 27, 2014
Thanks for faving!
Reply
:iconlethalkitten:
LethalKitten Featured By Owner Jan 13, 2014
Thanks for the fav 
Reply
:iconsilyah246:
Silyah246 Featured By Owner Jan 9, 2014
Thanks for the fav on my Elsa nails!! :D :snowflake:
Reply
Add a Comment: